Adulthood vs. Childhood

I went to London again on Friday and had one of those sparkling, lovely moments that I will remember for the rest of my life. My three friends and I sat on the Victoria Memorial in front of Buckingham Palace at night. We looked up through the damp mist of London on the 5th of November, a holiday here, and told fairly stupid stories. It was sort of a cliche "we are young and the world is ours" experience--or it was like something out of a John Green book, either way, it was pretty neat. I also felt young throughout the day, because I was able to walk for 10 hours with few breaks, and I was no more tired or sore than anyone else, despite being at least four inches shorter than everyone there.

Anyway, we came "home" to the flat and daily life settled in again like a grumpy sloth. I submitted my first round of assignments last week, and before more things are piled on my head, I am having sort of a lazy last day of the "weekend" and reflecting bitterly on my existence now. It's sad that when you're a (middle class, American) child, it is assumed that your immediate needs are met, so you can sit around whining for toys and or/candy. However, when you're an adult, or particularly a young adult, you automatically have to fend for yourself.

I was reading someone's blog post about Christmas lists and thinking that if I could ask Santa for anything right now, it would be a $3 sauce pan to replace the one that literally fell apart here. This is something that is not really revealed to us about study abroad. You have a limited budget of cash given every two weeks, which for some reason I go through way too quickly, and you have to buy all of your own stuff. Meaning: pans, toilet paper, hand soap, cleaning products to clean the unholy kitchen mess that is NOT our fault, cutlery, etc. These are all basic living essentials that you take for granted at home. And it feels ridiculous to be buying these accoutrements at all, because we're living here for only four months, not 10 years. There is also a sense of extreme jealousy when I see the girl whose parents live 20 minutes away buying a new mattress for her dorm bed because the other one is "just unacceptable". I will take my bitter self away now and be quiet.